You know a number of times I have thought about not posting to this blog. The reason being, that a lot of times I am not thinking about this stuff, and I am so over it. The thing that stops me each time, is this is the first time I have done a real exploration of my feelings about estrangement. Or about my family. Or about me and my family.
Many times I think I am all done, and I find another subject or feeling comes up, and the best way for me to explore it (strangely enough) is to write about it. To write about it all good, bad, and ugly. I don't know for some reason it's sort of an exorcism, releasing these thoughts ideas and mean pictures of my family. I am acting out in a way I wouldn't and couldn't before.