Victims

"If it's never our fault, we can't take responsibility for it. If we can't take responsibility for it, we'll always be its victim." Richard Bach

Main Entry:
vic·tim
Pronunciation:
\ˈvik-təm\
Function:
noun
Etymology:
Latin victima; perhaps akin to Old High German wīh holy
Date:
15th century
1: a living being sacrificed to a deity or in the performance of a religious rite2: one that is acted on and usu. adversely affected by a force or agent : as a 1): one that is injured, destroyed, or sacrificed under any of various conditions 2): one that is subjected to oppression, hardship, or mistreatment b: one that is tricked or duped.
I was subjected to "oppression" until I took control. People who take control of their lives, with responsibility and looking at all angles, are not victims. Other people may not agree with their actions, but according to the definition above, to be held to stranger's in society's wants, would be being a victim. To be held in servitude to others, is being a victim.

Saying no, setting boundaries, and limitations is not being a victim. It is not the problem of the individual setting the boundaries, if another can not respect them (being that they are reasonable, and not totally out there). Settling for less than what you need in a relationship, is being a victim. Being able to give as well as recieve in a relationship, is not being a victim.

Strange when the people trying to oppress you, say you think YOU are the victim, when you finally take your life back.

As far as me I live where I want near the beach, have a successful marriage and family life (minus three people by my choice), work in a field I love, and have discovered how to run my own business(es). I don't feel very "destroyed". There were periods in my life where I felt trapped to not be myself. Those days are over, and have been for a long long time. That's very freeing and positive.