Wednesday, January 04, 2006
Update After Chrismas & Thanksgiving
For those who have forgotten or don't know the story, you can justsearch my name, and it will come up. I think it was posted inOctober or November under my real name. The one I am currentlyusing.So I heard back today from dad. He said he never received anyHoliday cards or messages to respond to. Well, he got an e-mail onThanksgiving that could not have been diverted by the step. And hewas sent a Christmas card, whether the step diverted it or daddoesn't want to admit he did get it. I don't know. They werealso sent a family calendar, sadly that probably went the way of theChristmas card. For all her fakeness, the step seems to beslipping up more and more lately, I wonder when the blow out infront of the whole family will occur? Soon enough I bet.So he said the reason for not sending anything was he was giving methe space I asked for (fine), but also that he received nocorrespondence. Well, we know one of those things is inaccurate.Now, him and I have talked about the step frequently and at lengthin the past. There is no new ground to cover, except that she isout of my life forever. I have made setting up a relationship withme at all to be a zero tolerance on emotional abuse from him whichis inclusive of not discussing the step. Especially since she isblaming the failing marriage (what she says) on me. Enough, I havebeen subject to enough with this person. I've been nice for 18years, I have heard all of this crap, and I don't need to hear anymore from her (although she is actually been told she is welcome todiscuss this with me, just not through my father) and I certaintlydon't need it from my father. That's the problem, she uses him asher megaphone when she feels she can't get to me, because I won'tlet her. BUT WORSE INFINETELY WORSE, he allows this abuse to go on.So he basically said he couldn't do that, because I wouldn't allowhim to not talk about my husband. To which I responded, my husbandhas never been abusive to you, and if he had, not only would I haveput a stop to it immediately, but I would not require you to bebothered by this ever, never mind sitting through 18 years of this.So I then told him, he had given me his answer. I thanked him forrespecting my space in the interim, and I said goodbye.Actually, not a bad place for me to be right now. I really don'tneed to waste anymore time on this relationship. I can even see byhis e-mail, that he would be expecting me to do MORE for him, whilehe would continue to do the nothing he always has for me.Sorry a little bitter there, guess I am not in as good a place as Icould have hoped.It will come though, I know it will come. No big loss really, it'sreally the loss of something that was never there but alwaysbfantisized about.