Thursday Thirteen (13) Situations That Require Fakeness

1. Meeting a boss for the first time, and realizing instantly you are going to hate them.


2. Talking with someone that has horrible BO or too strong cologne.


3. (for me in specific) Talking to someone who you have a professional only or a very infrequent personal relative type situation or a potential client or referree for a potential client (the worst), and they are expounding (with no prompt from you) their wacked out view of pet ownership or how people shouldn't spend their money on pets when euthaniasia is so cheap.


4. If a rude clerk is doing a favor for you, but still being a bitch or bastard, and you have to pretend to be nice to get what you want.


5. A police man that pulls you over and is being a dick (happens more to my husband than me . Being rude really would not be the best way to handle the situation).


6. Someone says something demeaning publically, and you will take that up with them privately at a later time (for instance it happens at a holiday family get together).


7. Your boss has different religious or political views, and brings them up to you constantly (unprompted in any way by you).


8. Your boss, who you hate, asks you to lunch and you can't think of an excuse not to go quick enough. An hour of hell that you don't get paid for follows. (these have all been a specific boss, by the way, who was a religious and bush and "family values" freak. Oh, she also hated Jewish people----note I am not Jewish, but my last name is Rubin Duh, and I hate racism of any kind against anyone)


9. Following orders from a superior that you do not agree with.


10. You are at someone else's important ceremony in the church of their religion. I always pretend I am mouthing the words along with them, and then there is the infernal kneel or stand or sit that goes on. In the Jewish ceremonies (which are in Hebrew usually) I can't pretend without looking like an idiot, so I hang my head respectfully (which I guess is not faking it, as I am respectful of others beliefs)


11. You are at a holiday dinner and the food is AWFUL. One I was at, the disgusting brother (who hunts and looks like he did not wash for a week) had his hands all over the turkey. Course no one told me this until I was done, as they couldn't with him at the table. Barf, and it was the only thing on my plate (which I finished) that was reasonably good.


12. Your husband has his friends over, and you hate one of them or their wife:)


13. A friend or realative is going through a horrible personal crisis, and is acting like a boob in other ways. You don't really feel all that comfortable bringing this up at this juncture in his life.