- Not having calls about things they need me to do "right now" regardless of what I might be doing at the moment, or how far away I live.
- Not having call backs until I relent when I say "no" to something.
- Not needing to participate in stuff only the other person likes, and have anything I like to do scoffed at.
- Not wanting to call them for emotional support for anything that I know I will never get.
- Not having to pretend that everything is hunky dorey between us all ever, and especially at Thanksgiving or Christmas.
- Having enjoyable holidays doing what I want, and not needing to plaster a smile on my face and bite my tongue so I don't have a terrets related "bitch" attack. That is the uncontrollable urge to scream out "bitch" at the monster.
- Not having invites to family gathering soley as a purpose to be transportation for someone the monster wants to come.
- Not having those uncomfortable birthday dinners where neither one of us knows what to say to the other, as there is really no relationship there.
- Not needing to think of things or ways to "earn" the love and support of family members. Have gotten to the point where I believe they don't deserve my attention in any way.
- Don't need to lie to relatives anymore about our relationship on a day to day basis.
- Not seeing the monster, and not needing to pretend I like her if I do see her.
- Not needing to pretend to listen to my dad's dysfunctional advice or give it any merit. Having been clear to him that when he has a successful marriage, family, or career then he can give me advice about those things. Until then sutty uppy.
- The self esteem it gives me to not be anyone's doormat any longer.
Actually MY family is pretty awesome. There are strangers that I no longer identify with, and have not been in my life for many years. I am good with that.
Thursday, January 25, 2007
Thursday Thirteen (13) Things I Like About Being Estranged
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1 comment:
I LOVE this list. It is an incredibly freeing thing not to have to face things with dread and pretense. (or at least not in that particular area)
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